The News No One Wants To Hear

Being diagnosed with ovarian cancer is one of the toughest things to happen to a woman. You are never prepared for all that comes with this and how it will affect your life. It’s more than physical; it is mental, emotional, and spiritual for many. Due to it often being detected so late, it comes hard and fast. It catches your breath and forces you to make many decisions fast. It’s been a lot to handle, but you handle it. I have been courageously surviving this since 2015 for the second time. I thought I had a handle on how to navigate my life… And then, I had my oncology appointment in April.

The news no one wants to hear

I sat there in my doctor’s office, waiting for the results of a biopsy. My Air Pods playing my music and thinking positive thoughts. Somehow, as I sat there, I didn’t feel good. I think we all know this feeling. As he entered with a smile, I immediately knew something was wrong. After all these years, no doctor can “fake smile” fool me! LOL! I listened as he told me that the endometriosis I had years ago had returned and become Endometria/Endometrial Cancer, stage 3. There was a concern, but he told me there was nothing to be worried about. Just checking on things.

Taking time to process

I didn’t hear for a minute or fifteen, I am sure. But as I returned to myself, I realized I had two options. I give up and feel sorry for myself or fight as I have been. I will be honest. I didn’t want to deal with it for a few weeks. I didn’t make the follow-up appointment or discuss it with my family. I didn’t want to share it with my social media. I decided I wasn’t going to be an advocate. This was just too much! I was done. And honestly, my feelings were valid, and I was entitled to every feeling. But I came out of my fog, spoke with the therapist, and faced my pain, my anger. And that was the best thing. I was honest; I was ANGRY! However, I couldn’t stay in that place. I had to get through it. And that I did!

Moving forward as a warrior

Since my diagnosis, it hasn’t been easy! I have been in excruciating pain for many days. I have been hospitalized twice and had emergency surgery due to bleeding. Then, I had to return due to an infection from the surgery. I will tell you, though, that I was ok once I faced my feelings and was at peace with my life. I was able to handle all the madness that I had to face. Unfortunately, at this time in my life, I am not as mobile as I would like to be. But I am as happy and blessed as I desire to be! I still can wake up every morning. I have the love of my life who has never left my side. My amazing family has been a rock. And when all else fails, my grandson’s smile and laughter give me everlasting life! I am so proud to be here to be a Teal Sister and Endo Warrior!! I encourage you to keep fighting regardless of what life throws at you and show the world what a fighter looks like!