Don't Be Afraid to Ask for Help
During a cancer diagnosis and treatment, there will be times where you know you need help. There will also be times where you may not be ready to ask for help and be in denial that you may feel better if you do... We have our pride sometimes, and we know we need to do these hard things. You also need to know when it is time to ask for that support.
I didn't know what I needed
During my diagnosis, I had offers for help, but many times I had no idea what I needed. I let others take charge of things like a meal train or hiring a housekeeper for a bit of time. I was trying to figure out my next step and what I needed. It was hard to raise my hand and say can you help me? My advice would be, if you need help and it is being offered, do not turn it down.
Others want to support you and help make things easier for you because they know you have much more important things to do after a diagnosis. You should not have to worry about picking up groceries or taking your kids to baseball practice. You should be focusing on taking care of yourself so you can show up for all the other things in life. Like those baseball games or family dinners.
Ask for help if you need it
If you are feeling overwhelmed at any point, do not be afraid to ask for help. Hopefully, you have someone you can reach out to like a significant other, your family, or close friends. I'm sure there was a time in their life that you were able to help them out. Now they are now ready to help you. You can always repay them later if you feel that you need to.
If you know you need some help, but you are not sure where someone can help you, make a list of things. List out things that you know you need to get done over the next few weeks. Then decide what you are comfortable having someone else do for you. This can be anything from driving you to an appointment, sitting with you at chemo, or making you or your family dinner. Allow someone to run an errand, pick up your groceries, or even take the dog for a walk.
We all need help from time to time
We all live remarkably busy lives these days. When we are forced to slow down for a bit, we realize that we handle a lot of things, and we could use some help.
Maybe the help you need is for someone to come over and just be with you after a surgery or treatment. I had many friends come sit with me some days. Many times, we would sit and chat, which I needed, and sometimes I would nap. Many of my friends brought a meal, snacks, or even tidied up my kitchen those days. All things I needed help with, but may not have asked for.
What stage were you diagnosed with?